Grumps and rants

For the last time I'm sitting in my endeared balcony. I guess enjoying noise from planes in the sky, sirens from ambulances. Night is beautifully pleasant, close to full moon, breezy. Wrapped in my thoughts, few brooded upon, reliving good memories, burying the heart wrenching ones (Arlington Cemetery is close by). Gazing at small whatsoever Virginia skyline with clear head, empty mind like a clean slate. One on which anything could be etched and everything could be erased, again and again. I am going to miss balcony for an indefinite period of time. My body is aching and eyes are heavy from all the packing, cleaning. Am moving. This is figuratively and literally, both. I'm moving to the world's financial capital and moving on in my life, further and farther. DC had been the city where I resided, lived more than eighteen months in last more than half-a-decade. I can't believe myself it's been really a long time of more than two and half years. Years pass by but no...

I jostle with numerous things, things that are like cake walk for many. I merely can't figure or make up my mind. It takes me time to convince myself, to gather my thoughts and make route through them. As in whence I'm jabbing keys on this laptop for blogging I've to make some outline of the post, some times it's like a fog, few times I write in multiple seatings, edit, review and again consolidate thoughts. The picture is hazy, where to start, where to end is unclear.  A decade or so back I was prepping for an entrance exam and during one of the classes we were told physics is about feel. If you can't get it then it is going to be hard. I didn't understand it for many months until practising tens of questions, writing tests I consistently scored in single digits. Later on I quit preparations for the exam and aimed lower for I realized I'm unable to get idea of things quickly, as was needed.  I realized and practised this thoroughly yet I haven't sto...

It's 65°-ish Fahrenheit in the District. Evening is serene, save cruising sound of vehicles from highway across the apartment and loud noise from jets from airport near by.  This weather is totally marvelous, I could sit entire night without moving, yet enjoy every moment of it. Pleasantness is immeasurable in the Fall in DC. I'm going to miss it, very very much. Dawns are bit soggy, misty, foggy. Need an another layer to wrap, absorb a tad chilly weather with a savory tea. Time has changed. I'm inundated with some mixed feelings, doubts, some inhibitions. Things have changed, time has moved on, however, I reckon it's me who hasn't. Probably, time to rectify stuff within self. Not going to roll as always, had been, have been.  I ponder too hard on how and what causes these changes so slow, that are much needed yet take years to understand, identify, be cognizant of. People are mean, selfish. They are going to lie, absorb anything, nod, roll eyes as if things are ...