Can we pat an expat!?

Let me give a try on this post and share few points how it is to be an Expat. Ah yes, I am a graduate student on an alien land. After draining over an exhaustively exhaustive semester, sustaining the stress of presentation(s), assignment(s), applying for intern position(s), am energy deprived but to say, all that glitters is Not gold.

You reach a new land, air, and environment with a time shift of 8-11 hours. Beating away the terrible Jet lag, you disrupt your complete schedule: sleeping, working, eating, cleaning, washing, earning, spending money, behavior, thought process, reaction pattern, having cash as little as nothing in wallet and the critical one Cooking, which definitely one learns once settled down.

First few days, mind does not allow you to adjust, you float back to the longest flight journey you have ever had, the layover(s), hastiness to get a boarding ticket, searching the terminal of your flight, worry of luggage, waving off your relatives at the gate of a crowded International airport where you try to locate their faces, your luggage opening at the check-in to make sure if you have had brought non-allowed seeds, majestic view of the biggest terminal(s) and jet fleet you would have watched on Discovery channel, train inside the airport, free chocolates, food, coke, juice, beer, wine, confirming twice for the food provided in flight if it is a no-meat, eggless or not..  You awe at the broadest and cleanest roads, convertible cars and the most posh ones - which you would have seen on some Page-3 of a newspaper, might have dreamed to buy one.

You enter into a Walmart store, with eyes widened at the mammoth size and impressive lights; look at 20 plus different varieties of sauce, tens of cereals, go to another store, marvel at alluring offers on chips, cold drinks, beer(s), chocolates, biscuits. Back in mind conversion continues, oh, it is costly in Indian rupees. You pick things because of your desire and drop them after the calculation. Iterate to yourself, Damn, let me have a thick pay job, I will buy once I have. There are instances when you fail to explain to the store helper what you are looking for.

Moments happen, when; while reaching to a location you struggle to pronounce the address you are looking for, when; you get down at stop ahead of your destination when you misinterpret the streets; when, at a random Mexican restaurant you are looking for something hot and spicy and out of curiosity you give a shot at some dish listed and end up gulping it down instead of savoring; after all you were hungry for hours and again the calculation haunts in Indian rupees; when, ordered something veg (no meat and no egg ) and you end up tasting some stuff not permitted at your home and promise not to enter that shop again, which as expected goes in vain. When it rains, you fall nostalgic for the mesmerizing fragrance of soil, your mouth waters for Pakodaas, but you can't find any thhelaa, any Tapri wallah for a hot cardamom or ginger tea.

During the most lively times, namely - Raksha Bandhan, Diwali, Holi, Ganpati Visarjan, Garba you miss colorful dresses, the aura full and filled with joy. People send you pics on whats-app, and leave in a difficult situation if you should be happy for the festive mood or sad of not being present there? I am yet to find an answer and reaction(s) to it.

During break(s), you idle around, attempt to make new dishes, still nothing matches your home cooked food, you crave for kachori-samosa, poha-jalebi, wada-bhajjjiii-paav, and make a note to eat them to the epiglottis once you land back. You scroll down on Facebook profiles of everyone you want to talk to, but you cannot; remember time shift of 8-11 hours? You check last seen on whats-app, check out display photos, save them, zoom out-in to view your close ones near by. You remember all the birthdays, marriage anniversaries, upcoming celebrations at home may it be naming ceremony of a new born baby, inauguration of a new house, marriages, engagement, friends getting a new job, friends having new bike, cars, getting admit from the top B-school and you name it, your heart won't permit you to focus; be it be an interview for your dream company, last exam, final presentation, proposal submission, you just won't relent in to these no matter how worse it would cost you if you don't give 100%.

You have nothing to do but keep yourself going and kicking, you wake up in the middle of a night; think of the time at your home, activities of your mother, niece, nephew, cousin; you toss around and scuffle to go back to sleep. At times you want to see ping from your close ones, sit straight right in night, rub off the sleep; having not one you shut off the Wi-Fi again and stay wide awake to find solace.

Tough time comes, you got to trust yourself, irrespective of how bad and ill decisions you have made in past, this is it; you cannot ask, rely on anyone. Yes, you cannot. You cannot tell, convey anything back at home, friends; they are either sleeping or waking up when you got to talk to them, share anything. You are completely aware of the consequences of any decision(s) you would be making, you get hardened and take a pledge to confront it without breaking yourself. You make a path of an unseen journey which only you would traverse through, filled with enthusiasm you move ahead building up yourself, gradually; promising yourself to make things happen the way you want, if not, you would not let that thing rend apart your good will.

There are few things which come with a grain of salt, (Un)fortunately an Expat does get, perhaps, a larger grain of salt. We might not understand it, nor we might be able to comprehend what it takes to be away ~15K miles from home, we might never will.
Can we pat an Expat for her/his formidable decision?